when your day is not your day

This post was originally written for subscribers of the daily taryn, a writing project started in Dec 2017. Now's the perfect time to join, so I'll hold while you do so. Love u.



Relative to other people’s really bad days, I know mine wasn’t anything to write home about, but I have a newsletter now so literally anything is worth writing home about. Compared to my average day, today was bullshit. I spent the whole day putting out a work fire, while simultaneously sneaking looks at my phone for updates from my aunt and uncle about being evacuated in Los Angeles because of a real fire.

I cried 3 separate times today — 2 out of complete overwhelm and 1 out of heart-bursting joy (will explain that one at the end). Near the end of my day’s rope, I picked Kris up from the airport. I hadn’t cracked a smile in a hot minute before she walked up to my car with a cupcake and Christmas cookie, “to cheer you up!”

I have this really annoying habit of trying to skip dinner when I’m upset, but Kristina will not allow it. The whole ride home, she pitched different ideas even though she’d already eaten:

Her: pizza?

Me: nope.

Her: what about a cute burger spot? 

Me: nope. 

Her: I’ll make you a grilled cheese!

Me: no thanks, I’m just gonna drop you off and go home. Don’t wanna bum you out.

Fast forward 30 minutes — I’m zoning out as she flips my 2nd avocado grilled cheese, which is normally the best meal in her wheelhouse. Tonight, she burned the bread… bad. Hilariously bad. So bad, I needed proof:

cold, hard proof

cold, hard proof


Kristina interrupts me while I try the ol' scratch-off-the-burn technique.

It’s not going anywhere. Just embrace it.

Not only was she profoundly right about the disastrous, irreparable damage she had done to this innocent slice of bread, she also summed up my day as a whole. 

It happened. It was a shit day. You can’t make everyone happy. You can’t say the right thing every single time. You can’t control fires, and you certainly can’t control them when they’re 380 miles away. You can’t pray the wind away. You can’t hold back the tears when your body is begging you to let them flow. You can’t release the newsletter earlier in the day, even if you really wanted to. You can’t always send something positive. You can’t always make people laugh. Some days, you just can’t.

But when those days happen — which, they will, although I hope they are few and far between — you can embrace them. And if you can’t, I hope someone you love can step in and do it for you. Kristina’s day wasn’t bad, but she met my bad day with treats and some grilled cheese. She suffered through a Justin Bieber video that I wanted to watch, because that’s what you do when you like somebody. Their bad day becomes your bad day. You embrace it wholeheartedly, burnt bread and all.



Hi. I can't believe you read this — it actually means the world to me. Now that you're on a roll of making me happy, I'd like to give you 2 options to keep the fun going. 1) If you'd share this with someone or a feed of someones, or 2) you joined my newsletter. If that's not your thing, I'll love you regardless, but I'll do some middle school love letter journaling about you if you do either. Head here to join my list of gorgeous subscribers.