you know when you're in over your head??? — the daily taryn #2

This post was originally written for subscribers of the daily taryn, a daily email newsletter/writing project . Now's the perfect time to join, so I'll hold while you do so. Love u.

As the subject implies, today was a day of being fully in over my head. Without further ado, here's a series of 4 of the longest run-on sentence questions I've ever sent to anyone in the history of me: 

1. You know when you have one of those days when you wake up earlier than you wanted to and you're like hm am i hungover or did i just not get enough sleep or am i honestly actually someone that gets hangovers after 2 glasses of wine that I thought was really very fancy but was in fact really very cheap and now the "hangover" isn't it even worth it, especially because I'm working from home and have a few meetings to call into and am also babysitting my niece who is surprisingly sick but also still so surprisingly cute and you can't stop snuggling her while you watch Elf because she's so cute it burns, or am i catching her cold and that's what burning or am i actually seriously still hungover from the weirdly cheap wine???

2. You know when you have one of those days when you're moving through the airport after a 2 week trip home and have bags for literally days and are also carrying your girlfriend's bags but your girlfriend broke her 5th metatarsal (which you just found out existed) and has to use one of those weird knee scooters and it's really cute and also sad and also you realize you're not being as nice as you could be about the whole thing and you're actually probably being mean and grumpy instead of being nice and understanding and then you go through security and chuckle while she scoots through and then you're nice and snuggly again for a split second until you realize you're hungry and then you're mean again and you make your already sad girlfriend (because her foot) feel even sadder (because your attitude)???

3. On that note — why is it that when you have the opportunity to really show up for people and just really knock it out of the park with your patience and assistance and proactivity, sometimes you just can't and you become a mean version of yourself that honestly even surprises you because you've kinda been waiting for a chance to be ultra nice and ultra caring and instead you act ultra entitled and ultra jerky and just ultra stupid and selfish and you really realize it in the moment but some weird little monster in you actually can't and won't let you stop acting like a dick because you're already on that train and then the person you never wanted to hurt is the main person you're hurting and it's a stupid waste of everyone's time when you could've just worked extra hard to be extra nice and this night would've been much, much different???

4. You know when you're sitting on the plane writing your newsletter to send to hundreds of strangers and you're on a roll but you're a little self-conscious about what you're typing because it's so very personal and the actual stranger next to you is like 1.5 inches away and might be able to read what I'm writing but ironically, what I'm writing is being sent to a few hundred strangers that could honestly be her, so then you slow down a bit and start focusing on whatever free singing competition Southwest gives you access to and then you get off the plane and get dinner and get home and you're like "well shit, the thing I was writing is definitely not complete now" so instead of doing the normal thing of trying to finish it, you have an idea to write out what a cluster of a day your day was and write about that instead??? 

That's all for tonight. Thank you to every single one of you cuties who responded to my email last night — I always want you to respond to any email that means anything to you, but last night really blew me out of the water. The picture below is about a fourth of the responses, and I'm going to respond to every single one tonight and tomorrow:

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I'm so done with today that I'm not going to proofread one word of whatever I just wrote. Enjoy : )

Hi. I can't believe you read this — it actually means the world to me. Now that you're on a roll of making me happy, I'd like to give you 2 options to keep the fun going. 1) If you'd share this with someone or a feed of someones, or 2) you joined my newsletter. If that's not your thing, I'll love you regardless, but I'll do some middle school love letter journaling about you if you do either. Head here to join my list of gorgeous subscribers.